Kelly Caldwell is an ICF-certified coach who helps lawyers build sustainable, effective practices. Her work sits at the intersection of performance, mental health, and neurodivergence. She writes and speaks regularly on these topics. You can connect with her on Linkedin or visit her group’s website.
Most of the lawyers I work with are high-performing, capable, and respected. On paper, they’re doing well. They’re managing full workloads in demanding environments – and they are delivering. But behind the scenes, many of them are struggling in ways that no one around them sees.
What comes up in my coaching sessions is rarely a lack of ability or effort. It’s something harder to name – the constant effort of doing the work while also managing how they are perceived. For many lawyers, particularly those with ADHD or other forms of neurodivergence, that effort isn’t occasional. It’s relentless – and it’s present in every interaction, every email, every meeting.
This is masking. And it comes with a cost the legal profession is only just beginning to recognize.
What Masking Actually Is
Masking is the active process of suppressing or concealing traits that feel socially unacceptable – and presenting a version of yourself that fits the expectations of your environment instead.
For neurodivergent people – and I include myself here – masking is rarely a choice. It’s a survival strategy, developed early and refined over years. Most of the ADHD lawyers I coach describe an exhausting series of workarounds and compensatory behaviors. They are experts at masking, and the cognitive load is heavy.
